Wedding customs that every newlyweds should know


Today weddings are playgrounds for old and cherished traditions. Some of our current customs are centuries old and each has its own meaning. What they all have in common is not only that they have survived to this day, but that they should bring happiness to the newlyweds or keep evil away from them. cheap formal dresses

Originally, the wedding date was even chosen according to this understanding: An old belief says that one should not get married when the moon is waning, so that happiness never decreases. In addition, according to the vernacular, the sun still has to rise when the couple says yes - so an afternoon is unsuitable for a wedding after this performance. A bride can consider herself particularly lucky if on the way to the wedding she meets a dove, a lamb, a black cat or a spider. Even police officers, doctors and pastors who happen to cross the path should reinforce the blessing for a newly married couple. On the other hand - contrary to the experience of some bridal couples - rain on the wedding day doesn't hurt, because an old saying goes: “If it rains on the altar, it brings happiness for many years. “On the other hand, tears are allegedly worn pearls, as well as a dropped wedding ring on the altar, which according to old understanding heralds an inharmonious marriage. But there are said to have already been couples who married one morning in bright sunshine, laden with pearls, only met dogs and old women on their way to the wedding altar, saw the waning moon over the registry office, the wedding ring repeatedly on the marble floor with excitement peppered and still became very happy.

So apart from these old ideas, which wedding customs do you really have to know as a bridal couple? And what should you consider when planning a wedding if you don't want to fall into the trap of misunderstood traditions?

The custom of carrying the bride over the threshold

The tradition:

A 3000 year old superstition has it that evil spirits live under the doorstep. The custom that the groom has to carry his bride over the threshold on the wedding night goes back to this. So she is protected from the ghosts who do not want to allow the couple their happiness.

And today:

Even if she does not necessarily believe in evil spirits, the bride feels lovingly cared for when the man carries her over the threshold. Of course, that's not a must. Rather, it can also be anticipated through a game on the wedding day in which the bride and groom cut a heart out of an old sheet. Nasty friends traditionally give them extra blunt scissors for this. When the heart is finally cut out, the groom carries his bride through. That, too, brings happiness and promises a fulfilling marriage.

Cents for the bridal shoes

The tradition:

Not just a single coin is important for the bridal shoes. Originally, these were also paid for by collecting pennies. Girls were taught to save up for their future bridal shoes from an early age. So many collected for years, also supported by their relatives and friends, until they could afford particularly precious shoes on the wedding day. These then showed the whole society how thrifty the bride was. In addition to this practical use, the pennies should bring luck to the bridal couple.

And today:

In the past, shoemakers were used to paying for bridal shoes in pennies. Today you have to look around for a shoe store that is willing to accept cents for a pair of shoes. Shops are only obliged to accept small amounts of up to fifty coins. This will be a challenge for most, as bridal shoes are no longer available for 20 marks as they used to be. But they still exist: the guardians of tradition. So just be brave and ask in your shoe or bridal shop beforehand whether payment in cents is OK. An exchange for bills would of course make sense, but is actually not allowed. The nice thing about this custom is the anticipation: Many brides collect the money in a transparent vessel and can watch the amount grow and the time until the wedding go by. Other handicrafts can also make collecting cents special, for example decorating a shoe box with the photo of your dream shoes.

As a guide for the savings goal, it makes sense to weigh the empty container beforehand. If you assume that a cent weighs 2.3g, you can calculate how much weight you have to achieve for your shoes (minus the empty weight of the container). However, this rule only applies to 1-cent savers. Otherwise you only have time-consuming counting or regular sorting, e.g. in coin rolls.

The hen party

The tradition:

This custom has been handed down since the late Middle Ages, when it was first mentioned in writing in Germany. At that time, the hen party was also known in the Scandinavian countries and Poland. Traditionally it took place a few days or a few weeks before the wedding day and was hosted by the bride's parents. Close friends and relatives as well as acquaintances and neighbors were invited. The name “hen party” is derived from the sound that breaking porcelain makes on the floor. According to the custom, the guests brought old earthenware, flower pots or especially ceramics for the occasion. Usually this was then thrown in front of the bride's parents' house and the future bride and groom then swept away the broken pieces together. This ritual should guarantee a good marriage.

And today:

Instead of the hen party, the bachelorette party took place in many places. Since there is no stipulation how the celebration will continue after the china has been thrown, nothing stands in the way of a joint party for the bride and groom. Nowadays, this tradition is a great option for couples who are not in the mood for a bachelorette party but still want to celebrate with their friends and family in advance. Some even opt for a hen party the day before the wedding, because this way all guests can sniff each other before the big day. However, you should expect possible side effects due to excessive party mood. In this way, however, the tradition of rumbling can be continued and the newlyweds can practice very practically for future house cleaning.

The flower children

The tradition:

We have had the tradition of children throwing flowers after a wedding since around 1970. Originally it is a pagan custom, as the scent of the flowers should attract the gods of fertility. Therefore, when the bride and groom moved out, flower children were allowed to sprinkle petals in order to bless the two with a lot of offspring.

And today:

Flower children are not only a wonderful symbol of hoped-for children's blessings, but above all they are very cute to look at. Therefore, it is always a good decision to have one or two little companions between the ages of four and ten lead the way in leaving the Church.

To ensure that everything runs smoothly, it is advisable to choose a supervisor for the flower children, preferably of course a parent of one of the children. In addition to the beautiful petals or flowers that the children should then sprinkle, the focus will be on the little ones' cute outfits. Perhaps you want to make them a very specific basket beforehand or buy them. In any case, someone should take enough time to explain their task to the little ones beforehand. Experience has shown that children have great fun with it and adults look forward to watching them throw. Flower children are therefore a great addition to a festive atmosphere.

Throwing rice

The tradition:

Pelting rice is a very old custom in Germany. When moving out of the church or the registry office, the bride and groom should be wished for a large marriage. Rice is a traditional symbol of fertility. In the past, peas, pearl barley, juniper or nuts were sometimes thrown as well. These are also mentioned in old folk songs in connection with a rich child's blessing.

And today:

Although rice hurts the head less than nuts, it is still a rather unpopular custom among wedding couples who are thrown at them. In addition, the rules are relatively strict in some places: Throwing rice is almost always forbidden in churches, the regulations are very different in the entrance area, some churches also use signs to indicate hunger in the third world and therefore advise against throwing food. A rumor that rice swells in the stomach of birds and is therefore harmful to them is not true.

If you are looking for an alternative, you can either fall back on another fertility symbol with the flower children or you can opt for soap bubbles, for example. Usually wonderful photos are created when the bridal couple is greeted by friends and family members with a sea of ​​colorful bubbles on the forecourt of the church or the registry office. It is also a good time for balloons to go up. Cards that are attached to these balloons can be filled with individual congratulations by the wedding guests. If the card is then blown somewhere, the finder can send it back to the bride and groom.

The most popular wedding custom: the couple's first dance

The tradition:

Originally the first dance of the bride and groom was the wedding waltz. This dance is symbolic because - like the wedding rings themselves - it reproduces a circle, thus symbolizing the infinity of love and loyalty between the two partners. For us today hardly understandable, but the waltz was actually once considered very frowned upon. In the 18th century, however, it became more and more popular, even if it was still considered to be as immoral as rock'n'roll much later. This was due to the fact that the partners dance very closely together during the waltz and, depending on the speed of rotation, can also put their own feelings into the dance. It was not until the beginning of the 19th century that this dance finally arrived in all social classes.

And today:

If you don't like the waltz, you can of course open the dance floor with another dance at any time. Today almost everything from cha-cha-cha to disco fox to entire dance choreographies is possible. Still, it's sometimes nice to remember the old tradition. So why not start with a classic waltz and then suddenly go crazy to your own favorite music? You can be sure of the enthusiasm of your guests.

Wedding custom: throwing the bridal bouquet

The tradition:

This image is likely to be found at every wedding: the bride tosses her bouquet behind her and a flock of women fights to catch it. Originally, however, the bridal bouquet had a much more practical meaning: in the Renaissance it was supposed to keep the bride from swooning between human vapors and the smell of incense. Later the bouquet became a symbol for future brides. So catching the bouquet meant an imminent wedding.

And today:

In Central Europe and America, throwing the bridal bouquet is firmly anchored in the culture. The lucky catcher will marry her dream prince next. The bridal bouquet is traditionally thrown over the shoulder - depending on the bride's throwing talent, the unmarried girlfriends may gather closer or further away behind her. Since the bridal bouquet is sometimes highly competitive, it can also be affected. Think about beforehand whether you think it makes sense to buy a second bouquet because you might want to keep yours. By the way, if the ostrich is not caught right away, just try again. If there are enough unmarried women present, one is sure to be successful at some point.

If you prefer something more unusual, you can also raffle the bridal bouquet. The bride pulls the lucky winner from a lottery drum into which all participating women have thrown their names. Throwing the bridal bouquet as roulette is also becoming increasingly popular: the bride is blindfolded and all unmarried women stand in a circle around her. Then the bride is rotated until she has lost her orientation. Then the women start moving to music around them until it stops. At that moment, the bride opens her eyes and gives her bouquet to the one who is standing opposite her.

The male counterpart to throwing the bridal bouquet is all too often forgotten: Throwing the garter belt for unmarried men. That can be just as funny as chasing the bridal bouquet - also or especially when nobody wants to catch.

The bride kidnapping

The tradition:

The kidnapping of the bride on the wedding day has a long history. It is believed that this now funny custom had a rather serious background: In the Middle Ages, nobles and clergy had the so-called “right of the first night” when their subordinates married. So they could kidnap the brides of their vassals. Today it is difficult to understand whether these are actual events or literary fiction.

The originally justified fear of the groom was later transformed into a joke of his friends: the bride was removed from the wedding reception by the "kidnappers" and taken to several taverns until her husband finally found her and paid the bill for his friends triggered.

And today:

Bride kidnapping has become rarer today. Above all, there is hardly any triggering after a long pub crawl on the wedding day. Modern bride kidnappers usually leave clues to the groom and do not take the bride to a pub, but to a public place, for example. If you have friends who you think they could use an unobserved moment at your party for this game, you should consider beforehand whether you find it funny or even annoying. Some bridal couples do not want to be apart on their wedding day, which is far too short. However, kidnapping a bride by well-meaning friends can also be very funny. Just listen to your gut feeling.

Cutting the wedding cake

The tradition:

Wedding cakes have been an indispensable part of a wedding celebration since the 19th century. It was then that excitingly decorated cakes began to be offered at noble weddings. That quickly caught on and multi-tiered wedding cakes became almost a must. In the Christian faith, the traditional five floors of the cake symbolize the stages of development from birth, communion / confirmation through marriage, children and death. The sweet treats were adorned with roses, ring or heart motifs. In addition, of course, a cake figure could not be missing on top of the work of art. A certain ingredient was also essential: marzipan, which is also made from almonds. These should bring the couple happiness and a large marriage. The well-known custom of cutting a cake together is supposed to show who is wearing the pants in a relationship:

And today:

Five floors are no longer a must these days, but they can also be. The decoration is mostly still very romantic, but there are many modern cake figures in which, for example, hobby, occupation or some other specific peculiarity of the bride and groom is characterized. Depending on whether you have them made by the confectioner or buy them in the shop, they cost between 10 and 100 euros. However, you shouldn't bother buying the cake: it's definitely a job for your best man  or good friends. In addition, it can also be a wonderful gift - whether baked or carefully selected.

The joint cutting is of course part of it. During the subsequent kiss over the cake, however, you should pay attention to your dress or suit.

A saying: five things the bride should wear

The tradition:

This custom is probably one of the most famous wedding rituals of all: according to this, the bride should wear something blue, something borrowed, something old and something new on the wedding day. Often there is also talk of “something given”. The original version comes from the American and even rhymes in the original:

Something old, something new, something borrowed and something blue.

The blue accessory is a sign of loyalty and was often implemented in the form of a blue garter. The interpretation is explained by the English proverb: "Married in blue, lover be true." The new stands as a symbol for the new life at the side of the husband and the old for the previous life of the bride. Here, a precious piece of jewelery from the family heritage was mostly used. The borrowed symbolizes friendship. So the bride borrowed a small item, such as an embroidered handkerchief, from a happily married friend. The gift should also come from someone who means a lot to you, as a symbol that you will continue to be there for one another.

And today:

The tradition still exists and is lovingly cultivated by numerous brides. Of course, you can make it easy for yourself by combining several of these requirements in one piece of clothing or accessory, for example with a borrowed blue earring. Brides who want to make more effort, on the other hand, look for the right symbol for their big day in the individual areas. Here are some suggestions:

"Something blue":

In addition to the traditional garter belt, there are other small details in the wedding outfit for this color: e.g. blue painted nails, blue ribbons in the hair or flowers in the bridal bouquet.

"Something borrowed":

This deposit that the bride receives for the wedding day is more or less interpreted in the same way as it used to be. There are no limits to the wealth of inventors. Here are some suggestions that you may not have come up with: your best friend's veil, your grandma's hair accessories, or your married sister's hoop skirt.

"Something new":

This category is easy for most brides, as both the wedding dress and all other accessories were often bought new. Of course, a new handbag, a new piece of jewelry or particularly beautiful underwear also applies for the wedding night.

"Something old":

Here you can continue the family tradition. Today it no longer has to be an old piece of jewelry, although this too can be associated with many memories. A medallion with an old family picture, an old second-hand bag or possibly even a piece of your mother's old wedding dress that you have sewn into the lining of your own dress are just as beautiful.

The blue, new or old can be given to you, so you have the gift with you at the same time.

"... and a silver sixpence in her shoe"

it is originally called in the English original. The sixpence was a silver coin that was placed in the bride's shoe in the years 1551-1967. It should symbolize future wealth. Today this tradition can of course be upheld with every coin. If you also want to be absolutely sure, you can get this coin as a gift in order to really meet all requirements.

The morning gift

The tradition:

The morning gift used to be understood as a financial security that the bride had at his disposal in the event that her newlywed should unexpectedly suffer an accident. As the name suggests, this gift was supposed to be given the morning after the wedding, but it could just as easily be used later. Often it was about a certain amount of money, but sometimes also about a service provided by employees or something similar. The groom hid the gift under the wife's pillow, because it was supposed to bring special happiness. long sleeve formal dresses australia

And today:

Although the traditional notion of financial security for the bride is a thing of the past, the morning gift is still a popular custom. This is also due to the fact that it offers a nice opportunity for the newlyweds to give themselves a little present. Today the groom can also receive presents. The morning gift doesn't necessarily have to be something valuable, a creative idea such as a portrait or a voucher for a joint excursion is also conceivable. Some brides also give their husbands photos in beautiful wedding lingerie as a present to remind them of their first night as a married couple. It is only important that this gift is something very personal. Then the romance comes all by itself.

It is not for nothing that wedding customs have survived for many years to centuries. The idea that one can do something to enhance happiness together is just too tempting. So what's wrong with it: Belief in happiness never hurts.